9.7.09

Weight Loss Plan



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A man calls a company and orders their 7-day, 10 kg. weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."



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Without a second thought, he takes off after her.
A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.

The same girl shows up for the next six days and the same thing happens.
On the seventh day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 kgs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 7-day/20 kg program.
The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life.

She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."
Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.

This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck.
So for the next six days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the seventh day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 kgs. as promised.

He decides to go all out and calls the company to order the 10-day/50 kg program.
"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."
The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, “If I catch you, you are mine!!!"

He lost 63 kgs that week...





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8.7.09

Beautiful Pictures - Humour


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On their first night to be together, the newly wed couple go to
change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom, all
showered and wearing her beautiful robe. The proud husband
says, "my dear, we are married now, you can open your robe."

The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is
astonished. "Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are
so beautiful, let me take your picture."



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Puzzled she asks, "MY picture?"



He answers, "yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to
my heart forever".

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into
the bathroom to shower.

He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "why do
you wear a robe? We are married now." at that the man opens
his robe and she exclaims, "oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a
picture".

He beams and asks, "why?"


She answers, "SO I CAN GET IT ENLARGED"!



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